Nidhi's Equanimous World

  Carrying my broken heart I kept on going by My intrepidity was ripped apart When I cried out my eye   My dignity stumbled the minute, I decided to follow someone The leader in me took that bullet And told me that she’s done   I had the reminiscence of the distant memories from before, When in my defense I’ll never ever give up, I swore   I cannot identify the woman in the mirror And what she has become Her thoughts are not any clearer And her judgement is numb   She has forgotten that “it doesn’t do, to dwell on dreams and forget to live” Cause in her reverie, she isn’t feeling blue, She can easily forget and forgive   Until when do I need to feel this fragile? Till when will my heart bleed Before it can be agile?   Do I really need to chastise myself for it all? Do I need to compromise and take the fall?   Can’t I revitalize myself and be merry once more? Like a phoenix b...

Such beautiful eyes And such a pretty face To get to you, I’ll even tell lies And say your walk is full of grace   Oh I love the flattery With you my feelings will attach And I’ll become all chattery Afterall, I think we’re a match   I’ll make big promises Might not keep them later I’ll even fake having my catharsis Say im a lover, not a hater   I’ll believe every word you say And follow you with my eyes closed I’ll keep ignoring your cunning way Be numb to your vileness as if I'm dozed   Once I am well pleased My next goal, as I understand Is to move on and leave you deceived Beside my next option, nowhere you stand   I’ll be left heartbroken I’ll find myself to take the blame Somethings will remain unsaid and unspoken Now I know we were never the same. -NDS☯️

When they cheat, It festers a wound so deep That you never wanna repeat Loving someone else or take another leap. When they shout, It strikes the heart and mind, So much that you have a doubt That noone else can ever be kind. When they leave, It poisons the soul to the core, That you never wanna believe Another person anymore. When they break, They break you from the inside out, Despite, you get up for your sake, Another step you take, cause you can live without, All of them who made you a mess, All who treated you like a fool, The only mistake you did was to be selfless, But now, in your life, only you will rule. - Ruling her own life, NDS👑💗

Few days ago, I wrote "Don't abandon your brain in the pursuit of your heart's desire". And yes, it is wise, VERY WISE! But does the brain work when the heart's on move..? ENIGMATIC is the word I can think of as the answer. And by all means, it's an enigma to figure out what's fair and what's fallacious, because nothing sounds illogical when the heart has decided to find logic in everything. Furthermore, it can be one of the most difficult conundrums to involve the brain into it. So do we take no notice of the brain and blindly follow the heart? Is the inclusion of the brain a must? Doesn't the heart lives on by getting wounded? We can find millions of reasons to GO WITH THE FLOW. But it's tough to find the one reason to stay on the ground. As I see it, it's NEVER TO FORGET that the higher someone flies blindly, the more prone they are to get injured. - NDS😇

"Imperfection is beauty!" Great lines said by MARYLIN MONROE. And yes many people acknowledge what she said, but to what extent ? Expectations drive people! From "expecting from others" to "being the one others expect from", life goes on. But isn't that true that these expectations are the grounds of disappointments ? People expect you to be the perfect version in every wing. "Imperfection is beauty", "Imperfection makes us worthy", "Imperfection isn't vulnerability" - these all fit for people who are already successful and are a big deal in life. This doesn't apply to folks and commonage. Because from the core of people's life i.e. their home, they're expected to be flawless....LITERALLY FLAWLESS. You make a mistake - you're unworthy. You have to be just perfect in all aspects of your life. One might wonder, Is it even a humanly beleif ? Well, i would say it is very much robotic. Because robots are sup...

Lately I've been thinking a lot about my childhood, when life was simpler and happier. And when I give it a thought, I realised what made it that way..was my tendency to be in the moment and see things as they were(without complicating). And now as I'm growing older, each day I have more expectations, ambitions, responsibilities..and I prefer to see what I want to see and not the truth. It messes with my brain, makes me feel like I'm in a dilemma. So I'm having a hard time with accepting the decisions I've already made and with making the new ones. I believed that I was sure about what I want but I am not anymore. And right now as I'm mulling over this, I'm realising that maybe all this time I've been lying to myself. Maybe deep down I know what I want, but having difficulty envisaging it. And why not.....,because sometimes we keep lying to ourselves just because we're too afraid to discover the truth . And it is the hardest thing. So I guess I need ...